Something wicked this May comes . . .

I admit, the subject of this post might be a little misleading. I've just been hording that gem away for a while, waiting for something bad to happen this May. Thankfully, nothing has. May has been grand.

However, I did recently find out about this fine product: eyelid glue. There are many different brands and versions of this, but I particularly like the name of this one: "Koji Japan Active Eye Talk Double Eyelid Glue Waterproof", emphasis being on the ACTIVE EYE TALK. Funny-I thought we had mouths for talking, and eyes for seeing, but I guess I'm old-fashioned.

I digress. The point of the eyelid glue is to create the appearance of double eyelids. In a nutshell a double eyelid is comprised of the upper and lower part of the eyelid, above and below the crease. The epicanthic fold, if you will. And most/some/all/many Asians do not have this fold. Having a double eyelid created by a plastic surgeon is one of the most common plastic surgeries in Korea. It widens and opens up the eyes. It makes you look more deer-like, more like Belle from Beauty and the Beast, Disney style.

But before the plastic surgery, either before girls are old enough to get it (like if they are high school age) or before they can afford it (though in some cases it is as cheap as $800), girls will use eyelid glue.

My ability to describe the way eyelid glue works and what a girl has to do to get the appearance of a double eyelid will surely be eclipsed by this video, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4SMPB3X5Osc, so you should probably just watch it.

You can mute the sound since it's all in Japanese, and you don't even have to watch the whole thing. Just watch to the point where the woman is stabbing herself in the eye repeatedly, with the cute plastic prongs provided to her, until her eyelids are glued to her face. That should just about do it for you.

Anyone who has worn fake eyelashes knows how uncomfortable they can be, what with the blinking and the scrunching and the blinking. So, imagine the discomfort of having part of your skin glued to another part so tightly that you cannot fully blink your eyes. Not only is the glue not entirely safe for your skin and may cause some kind of chemical-related reaction, but it appears that you literally are unable to lower your eyelid over your eye to blink.

Now, I'm no scientist, but I think, if I remember my 11th grade physiology well enough, that our eyes need the act of blinking to clean themselves and to be protected from foreign objects, like dirt and yellow dust. Without blinking, our eyes are unprotected.

But I guess it's worth it. At least you look like Belle now, albeit a red-eyed, skin rash besieged Belle. Something wicked this May comes. Ok, I got there.